David Gillon

Number of times I've ever called 999 before 3AM this morning: 1

Number of times I've ever called 999 as of 3:15AM: 3

I was still awake as of 3AM, lying in bed, reading, when there was a scream of tyres and a very large thud. Given my house backs onto the main road at an accident blackspot, this is a sound I've heard before (maybe twice a year, and I've lived here since the early 90s), but this was definitely up there, maybe 2nd worst.

So I rush through to the back bedroom, can't see anything. Throw some clothes and shoes on, rush out to the back fence, and chin myself up to look over, can't see anything - including no reaction from anyone-else's house, normally there's half a dozen houses with lights on or people rushing into the street. This time it's just me. 

So I grab a crutch and hurry down to the bottom of the road, and around the corner, look down the road, nothing, look up the road "Oh, f*ck!"

There's a mini with its front end stove in sitting on the pavement opposite, and at first glance there's someone slumped over the steering wheel.

As I get closer, I realise it's just the semi-collapsed airbag.

But there is someone in the front passenger seat, who gives me a little wave as I look in - bloke, 30ish, trickle of blood on his forehead.

Me: Are you hurt?

Him: Rocks hand side-to-side

Me: I'm going to call 999

Him: Please don't.

At this point I'm noticing that they've clearly hit the telegraph pole 10m up the road, which is leaning 30 degrees off vertical and over the carriageway, and is possibly just being held up by the half-dozen phone wires that lead off it. If it goes down, it will completely block the carriageway, just around a blind bend. And the car had also taken out the front fence of the house where it had come to a rest.

Me: Sorry mate, no option.

So I dial 999, and wait for someone to pick up. And wait, and wait.

Eventually: 999, which service please?

Me: Police and ambulance.

So he puts me through to the police, and I wait, and wait.

Eventually the original operator cuts back in and says: "I'll put you through to the ambulance service, you might get a faster response."

By this point the passenger is out of the car, and clearly considering legging it. He gets into the front seat and tries starting the engine, which doesn't, not even a starter motor _whirr_. (Plus the driver's side front wheel was completely trashed).

Me: You're not getting that to go anywhere, mate.

The ambulance service finally comes on, I explain what's happening, at which point the passenger comes up to me and gives me a hug*.

Me on phone: And now he's legging it down the road.

Ambulance service: If he's left the scene, we can't send an ambulance out, I suggest you ring off and dial 999 for the police, and I'll try and pass it through from our end.

So I dial 999 again and explain it all to the police 999 operator, not helped by having a drunk come up and start asking me questions about what happened as I'm talking. I'm not convinced the operator understood the risk from the telegraph pole, as he seemed mostly concerned with finding a reason it didn't need an urgent response (is there debris on the road? is there any leakage?). He did ask me to repeat the car's number plate a minute or so after I'd given it to him, so I wonder if plate and car didn't match.

Eventually, him: We may send someone out, I'll text you a reference number, and I suggest you go home.

That was about half-past three, I waited until about 3:40, then went home, but I wasn't getting to sleep, so I got a coffee and my kindle and sat reading in the back bedroom until I saw flashing lights outside about 4AM. So back around again.

Two cops have got their car parked across the road, flashers going, and are looking into the garden of the house that no longer has a front fence, so have their backs to me.

Me: Hi guys, I'm the one who called it in.

They turn around, both are women officers.  *wince*

They at least were under no illusions about the danger of the telegraph pole, because the one who spoke to me while the other was on to their control room walked me away from it and clearly wanted me out of there as quickly as she could get me gone. She asked for a description of the guy, "My size and build" made that easy. I showed her the reference number that had been texted through to me, which she typed into her phone and then said "You're David?" "Yes" "Right, I've got your details, I might call on you later this evening, er tomorrow, er in the morning. But I don't want you anywhere near that, so I suggest you wait for a safe gap in the traffic to cross the road and go home."

I didn't think I'd get to sleep at all, so got myself a mug of soup and went back to reading, but fell asleep at somewhere around 6 or 7AM and didn't wake up, bar cancelling two alarms, until 1PM.

My legs are _very_ unhappy today, clearly I was on my feet for too long. Which is annoying as I wanted to spend the day at the local folk festival and it's shaping up to be the first decently warm and sunny day of the year.

I've gone and chinned myself up over the fence again, and both the telegraph pole and the car are now gone. Not sure what time that was, but clearly I got the right message across in the end. (One interesting note was I actually felt my yachting radio training for sending maydays etc kick in when I was on with the 999 operators, not sure if I changed tone, but there was a definite internal shift to 'command voice').

* It's possible he was in shock, but he was so mellow I've my suspicions it might have been chemically assisted.

 

 

1:15AM crash into my back garden wall, just what I needed.

Driver had apparently done a runner before I got around to check. Front of the car was trashed, and engine was extremely not happy. Wall looks okay but the streetlight will never be the same again. Fire engine turned up first, and decided to stay on scene until the police arrived, which took 45 minutes. Apparently they had to come all the way from Sheppey - 20 miles away by road. Where the Medway cops were I have no idea. One of them took a good look inside and reported not only a strong scent of booze, but pills everywhere.

It's now 3:30AM and the recovery vehicle has just left. Pretty much guaranteed they'll start on the streetlight with an angle-grinder the moment I get to sleep